Things have been up and down, but I'm just trying to keep a smile in my heart, in my soul and on my face. The main 2 things that I would say are bothering me are the fact that my dad still is staying here at my house. I feel like I don't even have a place to call home/my own anymore. I am always in my room whenever I'm home. I light some sage, incense and candles--so the atmosphere/energy in my room is uplifting and comforting. I truly cannot wait until my credit increases high enough to get my own place....At this point I don't think I'll be able to get my own place and will have to have a roommate, someone in which I can split rent with---rent is so high--and I really do not want to move in with a stranger, but it seems that's most likely what will happen.
The second thing that has been bothering me is my work situation. Am I happier here? Hmmm, I would say yes/no. Yes, because I get to plan lessons/activities for the children--based off of my own personal interests. But no, because the parents have everyday with demands--they have very high standards and expectations--and it's nerve wrecking because we just started the beginning of the school year. My co-worker is really thinking of quitting after our 60 days, which will be in October---she said she wants to just go back to being a nanny for the time being. So far, this job has just clarified my intuition that I do not want to be a teacher anymore. There's too many components that go with it(dealing with privileged people/parents, constantly bringing work home on the weekend, dealing with the attitudes of other staff). It's all too much and my patience has grown thin in these types of environments, so I've really been looking into going back to school to get my master's. If anything, the only other option I have is going back to PaperSource and getting more hours---this would also allow me to go to school at the same time.
I don't want to be discouraged career-wise or financially, but. everyone is traveling somewhere and I'm just here in one place, I haven't got to travel anywhere at all this year, not even to the Bay Area, like I wanted---sigh, I'm still pushing on and I guess I'll have to see how things go. I'm hoping for the best but am also weighing in on other possible options if necessary.
There will always be ups and downs in life,
but in the end everything will turn out just right.