It's so strange and weird how I have been in this weird funk all weekend. And when I say these feelings/doubts came out of nowhere--that's exactly what I mean. Lately, I have been very happy, taking steps towards things I want to accomplish, thinking positively and not letting anything get me down---then randomly this wave of self-doubt/negativity consumes me and I'm moody 24/7.
I am feeling a bit better now. I think the thing that helped most was letting what I was feeling out. I most of the time just keep things to myself because I don't want to feel burdensome to others; everyone has something going on in their life--whether they announce it or not. I also don't like confiding because sometimes I feel the things I feel aren't necessarily valid to feel. Anyways, my boyfriend asked if I wanted to talk about it, so I did. And I'll say after letting it out, I did feel a big relief that someone cared to listen. I guess I was afraid of being judged for the circumstances that were bothering me and I kinda started to feel like a loser.
I am grateful to have him by my side. I truly did appreciate his words and he didn't seem to judge me--even if he did internally. I truly do love that guy....which leads to my other thought, how can guys/men be so unappreciative of the women who are always their for them no matter what? My dad has been MIA for 3 days now! My mom has done nothing but stuck by his side through thick and thin--it's so disrespectful to be out in the streets for 3 days without even contacting her to say "I'm okay"--each day this situation is stressing me out and also making me truly detest him....How can men be so ungrateful???
Keep it pushing, babygirl 11:11pm