I am very thankful for my babysitting opportunities, they have truly helped me financial wise. I created a page on a website called care that helps connects people with families and babysitters. This year my main focus is finances, I want to begin to be able to save save save. Why? Because living at home is not going to work for me. Coming into 2018, I told my mom to no longer discuss nor bring me into the situation she's in with my dad. But of course that wasn't going to happen. Just yesterday from the moment I woke up there was drama. I was super angry and pissed off. To be honest, I feel I was more hurt than anything. Yesterday, my mom said some really messed up things to me, that really hurt. I ended up going over to my friends house.

It hurts me that my own mom would say such things to me---to her own daughter. I'm tired of all of this. Which is why I said I really need to save save save, I can't stand to be here. To be in an environment where I'm constantly put down and just have to accept and take it just because it's "family". I will not be put down nor have someone dim my light, talk down my abilities. I will no longer let her words effect me--I'm tired of the constant verbal abuse that I've been dealing with since I was a child. I promise that if I ever have children, I will make sure to shower them with positive words, especially when they are down. I will make sure that I support them instead of questioning them and ridiculing them---as I have been. This is exactly why I don't agree with the saying "blood is thicker than water".

Cheers to doing what I have to do. Stay strong and pushing Raven. You got this.

7:15PM